If you know me personally, you know that I have a hate/love relationship with blogging. Don't get me wrong; I love literature. And writing (come on, anyone who knows me knows I'm a stickler for grammar and that too many grammatical errors can actually deter me from finishing reading a piece of literature). But then there's that tedious aspect of feeling obligated to pour out your heart to the Internet community about your thoughts and rants and how your day went, along with the assumption that there is some anonymous person who just so happened to stumble upon your blog and actually gives a damn.
Continuing on with that stellar introduction, yes, I am back again. Just because I recently made some changes in life that hopefully contribute to my ultimate goal of true happiness. First, and foremost, the very thing I thought would never happen...(insert drumroll here + inhale of anticipation)
I quit my job.
I did it! I quit! And I've never been happier. Yes, I'm still in school and probably will be for a long time, but I just had to do it. It was like being in an abusive relationship (and while I've fortunately never been in an abusive relationship, I can imagine it would be similar to one), where you're afraid to leave, where you're beginning to think there's no better place out there for you. I'm not being dramatic; the reality is that this place drained the life out of me. It was to the point where I could be having the best start to my day, and the minute I walked through those doors, it was like it all went away. And I almost had to laugh at how quickly a customer, co-worker, or manager could annoy me. But I took a stand and had to get out of there. For my sanity, for my happiness, for my own personal and spiritual growth. And you know what? I kind of like love not knowing what my next move is. And I gladly take this (hopefully) short period of uncertainty over one more day working there.
This transition period couldn't come at a better time. Summer has ended and fall has begun, but I don't really feel the fall yet. The weather is still in an awkward transition mode, similar to the one I'm in. Looking back, I loved my summer. I got to go on a trip (Vegas with the girls for a bachelorette weekend), witness one of my childhood friends get married, attended one of the best youth camps I'd ever experienced, and well, there was one thing on my list that I didn't get to do. I didn't get my summer romance, but I mean, that's partly in fault due to the chick flicks I like to watch. (Still, it would have been nice...) Overall, one of the best summers I can remember having in a long time.
But fall...I look forward to. On a superficial note, I just love dressing up for fall better than any season. Not sweltering hot like summer, but not freezing cold like winter. I love me my jeans and leggings and boots and scarves and coats. But even more, fall is the precursor to the holiday season, with Thanksgiving being the first of the "holidays." It just reminds me that I have more opportunities to hang out with family I never get to see year round. I miss them, so much. Maybe too much. I regret taking all those times for granted when I was younger, every Sunday we always went to my aunt's house. It seemed like it was Christmas every week because we literally all were there, and always had this big dinner. And most of the time, I complained. If I had known then what I know now, I would have kept my mouth shut and made the most of it. But that's the thing--we don't know what's gonna happen in the future now, do we?
Anyways, that's enough rambling for now. Until next time...
